2 Timothy 4:7- Finish {well}
7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
2020 was a race, an extremely long marathon. Our December seemed like the Longest stretch of them all and It was our goal inspire of everything going on in our lives to not just finish BUT finish WELL.
Finishing
Finish Well- It is usually a blog post you would write at the end of something NOT at the beginning. Writing this blog post was supposed to happen at the beginning of December- as we finished up 2020 I wanted to challenge us all (myself included) to finish well…..AND THEN DECEMBER HAPPENED.
I woke up one completely normal Wednesday morning and within a few hours we realized that it wasn’t so normal and I was rushed off to the hospital to be dropped off at the entrance of the ER….ALONE. I walked out of there that day with no answers and in more pain than I came in. I would return two days later in even greater pain. In total four hospital trips. IT WAS HARD. And I was struggling. Finishing really did just look like the next step- the next second and in one painful morning. they next breath. NO ONE knew what was going on that morning……That morning I wasn’t sure I could take the next. finishing well wasn’t in my mind…SURVIVING well was.
Two weeks into January and I am finically finding the words- words that couldn’t be spoken even a week ago. My hubby was scared, my kids were scared….I was scared because in those moments when no one not even the doctors know what is going on…it’s scary.
Starting
As much as finishing well wasn’t an option, starting well is. The week of New Years I found myself back in the Dr’s office Tuesday Morning, which led to another ER trip which led to being dropped off alone, this time in the most excruciating pain of my life- it rivaled 4 labors and a horrible gallbladder attack. and in the end resulted in an emergency procedure that left me feeling almost normal. I came home Wednesday afternoon. and a waiting game ensued…..waiting to hear lab results. Saturday they came Benign. I cried. All of the emotion of the previous month bubbled out.
I could have worried and fretted fearing the worst and I ca tell you that God and I conversed each and everyday about the subject. I was concerned.
What the new Year looks Like
- Grace Goals– When I was planning for the end of 2020 and the beginning of 2021 I knew somethings had to change. Back in October and I had become aware of something and it hurt me very deeply. It kinda destroyed me- or at least it almost did. I almost let it- Hubby and I had really hashed it out (it wasn’t a Him and I thing). the realities I’m a people pleaser and it was something God was rooting out, and that’s when I found Grace Goals By Arabah Joy. I had taken the month before December to really work through all the hard process and watched the replay of the 4 hour bootcamp. I prayed and journaled my way through the process I set my goals and for the first time in a very long time I didn’t feel fear as I blogged. Fear of what other people thought. I am here to please Jesus NOT people.
- What I know vs. what I feel!- there is a bigger blog post coming on this subject but THIS changed my end of there year and really helped me to finish better than I thought it was going to end.
- Blog posts.- As I transferred my list of blog posts from one planner to another and corralled ALL of the blog post images I came to realize I have 27 blog posts waiting in the Wings for this year. THAT’S exciting for me. I know a few will be smooshed together. I am excited to restart this journey for sure.
- Changes- This is kinda funny I have already had to change up the blogging schedule because of changes! I removed a blog series I was hoping to do called Put Off…Put On. I was really hoping that this little study I was doing everyday would translate into blog posts but at this current time it’s not quite flowing the way I had envisioned hopefully someday it might!
- MONDAYS- As the New year rolls back in it is Hubby’s goal to get me back to church on Mondays – As a introverted mom of 4 kids who is homeschooling them I need a break and their homeschool curriculum is all on the computer so it’s easy for Hubby to give me a day off. we started it in the fall before all chaos broke loose and I have yet to return so for the time being I have been “sent to my room- aka my craft room”. It’s a little more difficult in the house because mom is one Alexa drop in away or just a trip upstairs. I really appreciate the time to have focused study and writing time and it has allowed me some quiet time for sure.
As we keep moving forward on this journey I want to do a weekly check-in. I hope to Next month join another book reviewing venture- I can’t wait for that opportunity again.
I hope that each of you have had opportunity to finish well! Let me know ways in the comments below that you have found to help you finish well.
Blessings, Mary
