One of the harder things in childhood is dealing with losing a pet. Whether the pet runs away or dies or has to be given up for adoption because of some unforeseen issue it can be devastating to those residing in our homes. We adopted Daffy a year and a half ago from the local SPCA. We were looking for a companion dog to help our then 5 1/2 year old son with Autism. The dog needed to be special! Super Special. For weeks hubby and I frequented both SPCA’s in our area. We already had a chocolate lab who was super hyper and really dumber than bricks! Don’t get me wrong we love him to pieces BUT he could not handle the task at hand! We met Daffy and knew almost immediately the wait had paid off! She was listed as a lab/shepherd mix but we stumbled upon an article about Belgian Shepherds…and we figured out Daffy!
We nearly lost Daffy a year ago. She got very sick and the vet found a mass in her stomach. The vet recommended putting her down due to her age but I could make that call while hubby was away. So the vet gave her a shot to keep her from vomiting……and a miracle happened, she sprung back! She became her old self again. We were so HAPPY.
A few weeks ago hubby noticed Daffy stopped wagging her tail. Her normally wagging tail hung limp. Something was wrong but what? A quick internet search said it could be ranging from a dislocated tail to a blockage in his intestines. 3 trips to the vet a couple of different pain meds, diarrhea from one of them, a dog that quit eating a refused to lay down and sleep later we found out that the poor girl had a herniated disc in her neck and a pinched nerve. We were talking about “what if the new meds don’t work?” Scenario. We talked on Wednesday night to a good friend who worked as a vet tech for some time, she said a week. She also warned that Daffy could become paralyzed. With a heavy heart, I went to bed. In the morning I didn’t call her to go outside and eat she hadn’t eaten in two days. I knew she would come when she was ready. I let Linus out and when I came through the kitchen door there stood Daffy , happy….and wagging her tail! I was so excited! She ran out and around the house. I had to call her back (I hadn’t had to call her she did everything right out the front door). She ran …RAN in the front door through the kitchen door and she fell over. It all happened so fast, within five minutes she was gone.
it still seems like it happened in slow motion…it seems longer..like an eternity but it was only five minutes.
But then the kids….we had braced the kids for a possibility but that was a ways off, what now? So sudden. Well first we kept them from the process 2 of the 4 tried to come downstairs during that 5 minute frame. We wanted them to remember the happy Daffy we all knew and loved. Second was to sit down and tell them…straightforward and honestly. Easy no, regrets….no .
Then a day off school to heal and adjust, which they did well. we looked at pictures and talked about funny things she did.
Our 7 year old son with autism….another story. Awkward in his response …lots of smiles. You could tell he wasn’t processing it. He would say he missed her but the emotion just wasn’t there. So we let it be. The let is letting a child with autism is to work through it as they need however the problem with that is this…you don’t know where, when, or how it will come out. For Weasel it was in Wal-mart the following Monday in the Dog food aisle. My poor husband……3 stores with an inconsolable grieving 7 year old special needs kid!
The other kids have all adjusted well, as did weasel. We all miss her a great deal. She sat with her chin on my knee or sat next to me as I did my devotions. When weasel would have a meltdown she wouldn’t leave his side. She would just let him pet her til he was calm again. And if you were sick she wouldn’t leave your side!
And almost every single person who met her wanted to take her home. She was a silent companion in the hardest of times. She really did almost seem human.
And she trained Linus to be a better dog. She kept him in line. They romped and played but when he got out of line she let him know who was expected.
Losing a pet can be difficult for the whole family, So I encourage you to be honest and loving when it comes to pets who’ve been hurt or lost. Let your kids grieve the loss of their friend. Don’t hide it and give them time!
how about you? Have you or your kids experienced the loss of a pet? What worked? What didn’t?
