Breaking Generational bonds- I don’t know if I have just coined a new phrase or not. But as I work with and care for various different age groups I have witnessed something that breaks my heart. And that is generational bonds. Now don’t think for a minute that I am going to stand (ummm sit ) here and point the finger at some generation telling you it’s all their fault.
It’s no one’s fault in particular- but it’s all the same problem.
Safety- we love to feel safe. And we feel most safe when we are in groups of like-minded people. We don’t feel judged (or at least not to the same degree), we feel accepted and comfortable. We build walls around our age groups and then we ostracize those we don’t belong to.
This doesn’t just have to do with generations, I know that. It can be all sorts of things. It can be as ridiculous as sports teams, but I do NOT have time for that nonsense. The short version of this is if you are building walls to make yourself comfortable and feel “safe” than you aren’t being a godly influence, you are a negative influence!
Side Note
I want to be EXTREMELY clear on this- there is a very very fine line between condoning sin and loving people despite of their sin. THAT is the line of influence Jesus walked. He loved people as they were but he loved them so much he couldn’t let them stay in their sin. He was gentle and kind and loving. Just because we disagree with someone does’t mean we have the right to be mean. We are COMMANDED to LOVE our neighbor as ourselves and then we ask who is our neighbor?
EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. Whether you like them or not.
How do I know this? The Good Samaritan!
We read the account in Luke 10-
Basically a Jewish man was nearly beaten to death. He needed help. He laid on the side of the road battered and Bruised AND NAKED! He needed help. Now two people walked by him. actually one person a Jewish priest crossed the other side of the road as not to even be close to him (He was worried about his religious standing). He could not risk being made unclean by the man (Blood).
Let’s come to a screeching halt right here
Now before we get all high and mighty on this priest I KNOW this is still a practiced within many churches today! I have seen it happen with my own eyes. Ever since I was little.
People come to church and they look different or they act different They don’t look like us and that makes us uncomfortable and we walk right by. We might even give them a sideways glance We refuse to help them because they have made wrong choices or they have no money (they must have surely caused that themselves). We deem them not worthy of our time and they might “stain our reputation”. Don’t say we aren’t all guilty of this at some point or another. WE ARE!
The temple assistant
This one gets me- he walks up to the Jewish man and he studies the situation. I often times wonder what was running through his head. I mean the priest it’s kinda obvious if you know Jewish law (AKA the Old Tesament)
But the temple assistant? He could have easily had the same reaction as the priest- afraid of becoming unclean and being judged. BUT that wasn’t his concern. His concern seems like he was assessing the reward vs. the risk. Like he was asking “how much was this going to cost me?”
And apparently we get the answer- The reward didn’t outweigh the risk.
I have see this so often too. It was taught to me not all that long ago via a book. We are faced with these opportunities to be the hands and feet of Jesus but we are taught to run these opportunities through a mental checklst….Do I have the mental and emotional capacity to handle this? Do I have the financial means to handle this? Do I have the physical ability to handle this….BLAH BLAH BLAH. I am not telling you to go out and donate a million dollars to some charity. I am telling you that sometimes like Amy Carmicheal or Hudson Taylor OR Corrie ten Boom that we need to step outside what we can afford, or what is safe and help the people God has placed on our path despite what the outcome might be.
Enter The Good Samaritan
Now this man was despised by the Jewish people. Because the Samaritans were of mixed race- part Jew and part Assyrian- but it wasn’t just that (though that was huge) they also worshipped differently (but we aren’t diving into that!!!)
The Jewish people HATED them. They ostracized them. And this Samartitan KNEW that and STILL had mercy on this man. He didn’t see a Jew, he saw a man in desperate need of help. So he set aside the cultural boundaries He nursed the wounds, put the man on his own donkey, and he took him to an inn and spent his OWN money and told the innkeeper he would pay whatever else was spent when he retuned He didn’t even consider the cost).
He didn’t check ANY boxes…NOT ONE. He didn’t seek out to find out if the man deserved his help. He didn’t take into account his own comfort. He saw a need and met it.
The point of this story
This story is one of the many parables Jesus told to make a powerful point. A Jewish lawyer’s quizzing Jesus to catch him in something he might say that went against God’s word.
He asked Jesus who was his neighbor. And Jesus told this parable to make a point. In the end Jesus answers this man’s question with a question. “in this story who is the man’s neighbor?” The Jewish Lawyer answers “the one who showed the man mercy.” Jesus’ simple reply “Go and do likewise.”
There were no specifications….No guidelines…no boundaries.
YIKES.
That means NO walls. That means BRIDGES. MERCY is the bridge.
Back to Generational Bonds
When we build walls we are imprisoning ourselves. We think we are keeping ourselves safe BUT what we are really doing is creating our own little prisons.
Think about an island in the middle of a raging river. You have no boat. You have no way across this treacherous river. You could attempt to swim it in your own stregthit but everyone who has ever tried drowned after only entering the river a few feet from shore.
If you don’t leave the island you are going to die of starvation. You have sucked the life out of the island because you have consumed all the usable food sources. The only other nourishment is on the mainland. But that is scary, uncomfortable and unknown.
You can choose to whither away or to take a step of faith and build a bridge. That bridge is going to take a lot of work. It’s not going to be easy. But in the end it will be worth it. You have a decision to make.
The proverbial island in real life
Just like that decision we have a choice to build bridges between generations. We can tear down the walls we have built around the generations in church and start building bridges between the generations. We need to tear down the walls of our preferences…music, dress, socio-economic status, position, and so on. And we need to start building bridges of mercy and love.
A HUGE Step
We need to stop posting degrading things on the internet about millennials, and Gen-Zer;s. We even need to stop posting things about Karens and snowflakes. Hubby and I are odd one’s out. we are born in the awkward years where we just plain don’t fit. So then we have to take a long look at the actual list of traits of the two generations (the actual traits not some opinions imposed) and see where we fall (I’ll let you in on a secret- we both are millennials). And there isn’t anything wrong with that. Though facebook posts might tell us otherwise.
But when we take and post degrading things about other people- DONT really care who it is we are building walls not bridges. We are choosing harshness over gentleness. You can go right down the list of Negative influence traits we talked about last week and check them all off.
Burning bridges
And when you seek to build bridges and then because something strikes you as funny we click the share button….and with one little click we burn that bridge. Our testimony and our godly influence falls right into the river and is washed away. Choosing t be devisive is Not a godly influence trait NO MATTER the topic!
- One little overheard gossip
- A snarky comment.
- One opinion given off the cuff
- One moment of selfish ambition
- One off color joke about someone or some circumstance.
We all love to demand respect because we deserve it. Respect is a two way street. Treat others how you want to be treated
In light oof this….
Tomorrow we are going to discuss the Powerful influence of our children. And how as parents and grandparents and spiritual parents and grandparents we can be impacted by our “kids” and their influence. AND how if we aren’t careful we can destroy their faith by the negative influence of our words- When our walk doesn’t match our talk.
A Big thank You
Thank you so much for joining me today. This subject as been a point of passion since I was in Bible College and I heard one of my professors preach on bridging the generation gap. It’s time we break these generational bonds that hold us captive in our own personal prisons. Let’s tear downs these walls and start building bridges- It will save the life of our dying churches and families!
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Write 31 Days 2018 Influence Posts
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